The Blanket

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Exclusive — Bobby Tohill Kidnaps Self


Staff Reporter, Andytown Blews • 12 October 2004

In an extraordinary development, the DPP is to bring charges of kidnapping and attempted suicide against the dissident republican, Bobby Tohill.

"After reviewing CCTV footage of the fracas and re-interviewing key witnesses, we feel we can now successfully proceed with the case against Mr Tohill," Crown prosecuter Hang M. Hygh said.

Witnesses say that on the night in question, Tohill, who had been on the drink in Kelly's Cellars, suddenly began acting crazier than usual.

"All of a sudden he started shouting a bunch of nonsense and then he reached around and grabbed himself from behind at the top of his head and started to drag himself out of the bar by his hair," a witness, who declined to be named, explained. "You really had to see it to believe it."

It is understood CCTV footage from security cameras outside the bar caught Mr Tohill exiting the bar. He is shown macing himself and then falling to the ground kicking and screaming. It appears he gave himself a black eye in the fall. He was also wearing a white boiler suit. "Bobby often comes to Kelly's for a quiet pint after work," bar staff told the Andytown Blews.

Shortly after, Mr Tohill disappears from camera view as he is rolling around on the ground. It is a few moments later that he is apprehended by PSNI.

Constable Billy Shootspatrick was the arresting officer.

"We observed a white van driving erratically and pulled it over. We found Mr Tohill, bloodied and bruised, in the driver's seat. How he managed that we will never know. Upon questioning he told us he was kidnapping himself and taking himself to South Armagh to blow his head off and make it look like he disappeared. He asked us for our help in stopping him, and we complied."

The DPP is preparing charges for tomorrow's court session.

















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The Blanket - A Journal of Protest & Dissent



All censorships exist to prevent any one from challenging current conceptions and existing institutions. All progress is initiated by challenging current conceptions, and executed by supplanting existing institutions. Consequently the first condition of progress is the removal of censorships.
- George Bernard Shaw

Index: Current Articles

12 October 2004

Other Articles From This Issue:

George Harrison: An Appreciation
Sandy Boyer

Derrida, doctrinaires, debate
Seaghán Ó Murchú

That Hammering Sound
Michael Youlton

Truth Hurts
Mick Hall

Left Nationalism In Euskal Herria
Anthony McIntyre


The Letters page has been updated.

9 October 2004

Death of George Harrison
Ruairi O Bradaigh, National Irish Freedom Committee and Brian Mór

Can't Deal, Won't Deal
Anthony McIntyre

Update - Youth Suicide Prevention Project
J. Terry Ryan

Father Mc Manus on Ron Lauder, David Trimble, the Orange Order, and Catholic anti-Semitism
Father Sean Mc Manus

Say it in Breac'n English (Part Four)
Seaghán Ó Murchú

Some Inconvenient Facts
Patrick Hurley

Marx, Engels and Lenin on the Irish Question
Liam O Ruairc

The Gates of Hell
Elana Golden

After the Venezuela Referendum
Toni Solo

One for the Road
Brian Mór



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